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I Never Met a Pig I Didn’t Like

Liberace and Clem Kadiddlehopper at their glittery best in The Red Skelton Hour episode, "I Never Met a Pig I Didn't Like"Z

In I Never Met a Pig I Didn’t Like, can Clem Kadiddlehopper ruin his half-brother Liberace’s musical debut? Do you have to ask?

I Never Met a Pig I Didn’t Like – The Red Skelton Hour season 17 with Liberace

Monologue

Gertrude and Heathcliffe, two seagulls, see. He said, “Say, did you hear that they’re going to ban all the owls in France?” She says, “No! Why are they going to ban all the owls in France?” He says, “Because when De Gaulle says, ‘I am the greatest’, they say, ‘Who?'”

Red ends with a pantomime about someone backstage in a dressing room, playing with their reflection in a mirror. With an unexpected, and funny, ending.

I Never Met a Pig I Didn’t Like – Act I

Clem Kadiddlehopper hunting for a skunk in "I Never Met a Pig I Didn't Like"
Pa Kadiddlehopper, Clem, and his half-brother … Liberace?
Liberace playing a toy piano on the Kadiddlehopper farm - with a lamp instead of a candelabra!

At the farm, Clem Kadiddlehopper is driving his poor brother crazy. Trying to hunt down a skunk, shooting a man in a barrel. And his half brother, Liberace, isn’t much help either.

Liberace: I’m not putting my hands in that hot water. It’ll shrink my fingers.
Clem Kadiddlehopper: Good! You can milk the short cows!

While the brothers are fighting over doing the laundry, wealthy Mrs. Abercrombie comes by with a load of laundry. Amidst Clem’s multitude of fat jokes, Liberace plays a tune on his toy piano. And he’s hired by her to play at her musicale that night! And Clem … gets to turn the pages on his brother’s music.

I Never Met a Pig I Didn’t Like – Act II

Liberace and Clem Kadiddlehopper at their glittery best in The Red Skelton Hour episode, "I Never Met a Pig I Didn't Like"Z
Clem Kadiddlehopper borrows a chair - a funny visual gag
Clem Kadiddlehopper "helps" Liberace by turning the music pages

At Mrs. Abercrombie’s party, Liberace arrives in his glittery best. As does Clem! And after Clem drags a poor harpist through his harp, and irritates the music critic, they’re ready to perform!

Clem Kadiddlehopper: Did you know he can play in any flat if he gets the right key?

Liberace: I’d commit suicide, if I wasn’t so fond of myself.

Classic Red Skelton Sketch – getting out of the hospital (from Ambulance Driver season 1)

Nurse Lucy Knoch gives Red Skelton his hospital bill -- causing a relapse!
New father at the hospital - THAT'S my baby?!?
New father at the hospital - triplets? from"Ambulance Driver"

Followed by the musical number, “Don’t Say Hello“.

One Minute Dramas

In the One Minute Drama, Liberace is building a house of cards - that Red intends to blow over!
In the One Minute Drama, Red Skelton goes to see witch doctor Liberace about a stabbing pain …
In the One Minute Drama, the pitchman (Liberace) tries to sell Red Skelton a potion so he'll never have to brush his teeth again …
  • Liberace builds a house of cards. Which Red tries to blow over!
  • Liberace plays witch doctor with Red as his patient. But pulling pins out of the voodoo doll doesn’t help, until …
  • Liberace is a snake oil salesman, selling a concoction so Red will never have to brush his teeth again. Be careful what you wish for!

Silent Spot – Cowardly Brave

Red plays an Indian caught in a love triangle. Oddly enough, it’s the bully that’s the coward! A very funny segment, with lots of visual humor.

Indian Chief Red Skelton in the Silent Spot, Cowardly Brave
Can Red Skelton impress the Indian maid with his juggling skills?
Can he impress her with his archery? Not when he hits the bully in the rear!
Indian Bully living up to his name
Romantic triangle - Red Skelton kissing the pretty Indian maid, while the bully tries to break them up
Break glass in case of emergency
Indian papoose, working for the bully, shoots Red Skelton!
And Red Skelton's dying message - Ouch!

Songs

  • Liberace performs ‘All The Things You Are.’
  • The Youngfolk sing ‘Gotta Travel On‘
  • They join Liberace for ‘Feelin’ Groovy.’

Trivia

  • Liberace’s final acting role

Cast of characters

  • Red Skelton … Host / Clem Kadiddlehopper / Gertrude and Heathcliffe / Cowardly Brave
  • The Alan Copeland Singers … Themselves
  • Jan Arvan Jan Arvan … Paw Kadiddlehopper
  • David Rose and His Orchestra … Themselves
  • Walker Edmiston (The Great Mouse Detective; Land of the Lost TV) … Bald Man at Recital
  • Art Gilmore … Announcer (voice)
  • James Lanphier (The Pink Panther) … Music Critic
  • Liberace … Lee Kadiddlehopper
  • Brad Logan … Indian Brave Bully
  • Barbara Morrison (Project Moonbase ) … Mrs. Abercrombie
  • Marie Roe … Indian Maiden
  • David Sharpe … Sam Jenkins
  • Tom Hansen Dancers … Themselves
  • The Youngfolk Singing Aggregation … Themselves
  • Billy Beck … Man With Toupee at Recital (uncredited)
  • Beverly Powers Beverly Powers … One Minute Dramas Cue Card Lady (uncredited)
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