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I Never Met a Pig I Didn’t Like

Liberace and Clem Kadiddlehopper at their glittery best in The Red Skelton Hour episode, "I Never Met a Pig I Didn't Like"Z

In I Never Met a Pig I Didn’t Like, can Clem Kadiddlehopper ruin his half-brother Liberace’s musical debut? Do you have to ask?

I Never Met a Pig I Didn’t Like – The Red Skelton Hour season 17 with Liberace


Gertrude and Heathcliffe, two seagulls, see. He said, “Say, did you hear that they’re going to ban all the owls in France?” She says, “No! Why are they going to ban all the owls in France?” He says, “Because when De Gaulle says, ‘I am the greatest’, they say, ‘Who?'”

Red ends with a pantomime about someone backstage in a dressing room, playing with their reflection in a mirror. With an unexpected, and funny, ending.

I Never Met a Pig I Didn’t Like – Act I

At the farm, Clem Kadiddlehopper is driving his poor brother crazy. Trying to hunt down a skunk, shooting a man in a barrel. And his half brother, Liberace, isn’t much help either.

Liberace: I’m not putting my hands in that hot water. It’ll shrink my fingers.
Clem Kadiddlehopper: Good! You can milk the short cows!

While the brothers are fighting over doing the laundry, wealthy Mrs. Abercrombie comes by with a load of laundry. Amidst Clem’s multitude of fat jokes, Liberace plays a tune on his toy piano. And he’s hired by her to play at her musicale that night! And Clem … gets to turn the pages on his brother’s music.

I Never Met a Pig I Didn’t Like – Act II

At Mrs. Abercrombie’s party, Liberace arrives in his glittery best. As does Clem! And after Clem drags a poor harpist through his harp, and irritates the music critic, they’re ready to perform!

Clem Kadiddlehopper: Did you know he can play in any flat if he gets the right key?

Liberace: I’d commit suicide, if I wasn’t so fond of myself.

Classic Red Skelton Sketch – getting out of the hospital (from Ambulance Driver season 1)

Followed by the musical number, “Don’t Say Hello“.

One Minute Dramas

  • Liberace builds a house of cards. Which Red tries to blow over!
  • Liberace plays witch doctor with Red as his patient. But pulling pins out of the voodoo doll doesn’t help, until …
  • Liberace is a snake oil salesman, selling a concoction so Red will never have to brush his teeth again. Be careful what you wish for!

Silent Spot – Cowardly Brave

Red plays an Indian caught in a love triangle. Oddly enough, it’s the bully that’s the coward! A very funny segment, with lots of visual humor.


  • Liberace performs ‘All The Things You Are.’
  • The Youngfolk sing ‘Gotta Travel On
  • They join Liberace for ‘Feelin’ Groovy.’


  • Liberace’s final acting role

Cast of characters

  • Red Skelton … Host / Clem Kadiddlehopper / Gertrude and Heathcliffe / Cowardly Brave
  • The Alan Copeland Singers … Themselves
  • Jan Arvan Jan Arvan … Paw Kadiddlehopper
  • David Rose and His Orchestra … Themselves
  • Walker Edmiston (The Great Mouse Detective; Land of the Lost TV) … Bald Man at Recital
  • Art Gilmore … Announcer (voice)
  • James Lanphier (The Pink Panther) … Music Critic
  • Liberace … Lee Kadiddlehopper
  • Brad Logan … Indian Brave Bully
  • Barbara Morrison (Project Moonbase ) … Mrs. Abercrombie
  • Marie Roe … Indian Maiden
  • David Sharpe … Sam Jenkins
  • Tom Hansen Dancers … Themselves
  • The Youngfolk Singing Aggregation … Themselves
  • Billy Beck … Man With Toupee at Recital (uncredited)
  • Beverly Powers Beverly Powers … One Minute Dramas Cue Card Lady (uncredited)