Jokes
Jokes by Red Skelton on a variety of subjects. He was known as “America’s Clown Prince” for a reason, and was fond of funny stories as well as outright puns! Enjoy!
Have you seen the new cars? | Gertrude and Heathcliff
Have you seen the new cars? | Gertrude and Heathcliff – Red Skelton’s famous seagull characters, Heathcliff and Gertrude, on the new cars …
Red Skelton’s famous seagulls, Gertrude and Heathcliff:Read More »Have you seen the new cars? | Gertrude and Heathcliff
Margaret Thatcher and the Queen’s English
Margaret Thatcher and the Queen’s English – A joke told by Red Skelton, about meeting Margaret Thatcher
(Editor’s note: This is a joke told by Red Skelton, when he met Margaret Thatcher, the former Prime Minister of the United Kingdom)
Read More »Margaret Thatcher and the Queen’s EnglishRed Skelton joke about old man marrying young woman
Red Skelton joke about an old man marrying a young woman – Red Skelton tells a joke about the 98-year-old man who’s going to marry a 20-year-old waitress
Red Skelton: I met a fella the other day and he told me he was 98 years old.
Then he tells me he’s getting married to a twenty year old waitress.Read More »Red Skelton joke about old man marrying young woman
Red Skelton on the law of gravity
Red Skelton on the law of gravity – From Red Skelton’s movie, ‘Whistling in Brooklyn‘, a joke between Red and Rags Ragland on the law of gravity, with a good punchline!
Wally Benton (Red Skelton): Don t take that off, the elevator will fall!Read More »Red Skelton on the law of gravity
Your gag went out with Santa Claus
Your gag went out with Santa Claus – From Red Skelton’s movie, ‘Whistling in Brooklyn‘, where he’s trying to fool a gangster … and failing!
Creeper: Your gag went out with Santa Claus.
Wally Benton (Red Skelton): Santa Claus didn’t go out.Read More »Your gag went out with Santa Claus
Democrat senator on what the U.S. government …
Democrat senator on what the U.S. government should do about big business.
Proving that ‘everything old is new again’, this is a joke from the Red Skelton movie, ‘The Fuller Brush Man‘ where Red is using radios to call for help, while gangsters are trying to break in on him … and starts interrupting commercial radio broadcasts, with some very funny results.
Read More »Democrat senator on what the U.S. government …Clawed by a bear
Clawed by a bear – From the Red Skelton radio show … apparently, Red hated paying his taxes just like the rest of us!
Rod O’Connor: It looks like you had trouble doing your income tax.Read More »Clawed by a bear
Sweet Chariot Skelton
Sweet Chariot Skelton – From the Red Skelton radio show, Red tells the story of how he used to be a boxer …
Rod O’Connor: You were a fighter?
Red Skelton: Sure, they called me “Sweet Chariot” Skelton. Read More »Sweet Chariot Skelton
We was playing Pin the Tail on the Elephant
We was playing Pin the Tail on the Elephant – A joke from the classic radio program, The Red Skelton Show, starring Red’s famous Mean… Read More »We was playing Pin the Tail on the Elephant